Archived

Corny Jokes

Post a reply

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby Slowhand » Mon Mar 16, 2015 16:22:27

The Dude wrote:
Slowhand wrote:
WheelsFellOff wrote:A one-L lama is a religious leader. A two-L llama is a South American pack animal. A three-L lllama is a really big Boston fire.


I just told this one at work and nobody got it. :|


did you write it out or tell it in person?


I wrote it out. I feel like it should be pretty obvious either way, but I work with weirdos.
How dare you interrupt my Lime Rickey!

Slowhand
Plays the Game the Right Way
Plays the Game the Right Way
 
Posts: 30275
Joined: Fri Jan 12, 2007 04:26:24
Location: Flattening the curve
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby The Dude » Mon Mar 16, 2015 16:31:22

i think it's hard to do that one out loud. you really gotta sell the boston accent, and then you're just giving it away
BSG HOF '25

The Dude
BSG MVP
BSG MVP
 
Posts: 30280
Joined: Thu Dec 28, 2006 23:04:37
Location: 250 52nd st
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby Bucky » Tue Mar 17, 2015 08:24:49

Image

Bucky
BSG MVP
BSG MVP
 
Posts: 58017
Joined: Fri Dec 29, 2006 19:24:05
Location: You_Still_Have_To_Visit_Us
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby WheelsFellOff » Tue Mar 17, 2015 08:26:14

And, sadly, your family can only carry 80 pounds of you back to bury.
So far the Eagles have been unable willing to at least make a good will jester - Garry Cobb, Professional Sportswriter

jerseyhoya wrote:My hatred of quote boxes in signatures has reached a new high

WheelsFellOff
Plays the Game the Right Way
Plays the Game the Right Way
 
Posts: 27290
Joined: Thu Mar 25, 2010 13:43:13
Location: Bologna
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby Phred » Tue Mar 17, 2015 10:57:24

The Amazon Echo told us this one:

What's brown and sticky?

[Reveal] Spoiler:
a stick
Phred
Dropped Anchor
Dropped Anchor
 
Posts: 5349
Joined: Thu Dec 20, 2012 16:41:59
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby Soren » Thu Mar 19, 2015 11:14:08

I don't understand why people keep asking me what I plan on doing in five years ...

[Reveal] Spoiler:
I don't have 2020 vision!
Olivia Meadows, your "emotional poltergeist"

Soren
Plays the Game the Right Way
Plays the Game the Right Way
 
Posts: 39874
Joined: Thu May 28, 2009 13:44:19
Location: area x
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby Phan In Phlorida » Sat Mar 21, 2015 04:23:02

Who's the least guilty US President?

[Reveal] Spoiler:
Lincoln. He's in a cent.
▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۞۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

Phan In Phlorida
Space Cadet
Space Cadet
 
Posts: 12571
Joined: Sat Dec 30, 2006 03:51:57
Location: 22 Acacia Avenue
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby phatj » Mon Apr 13, 2015 19:31:35

Heard this from my daughter...

What do you call a pony that's coming down with a cold?
they were a chick hanging out with her friends at a bar, the Phillies would be the 320 lb chick with a nose wart and a dick - Trent Steele

phatj
Moderator
 
Posts: 20683
Joined: Thu Dec 28, 2006 23:07:06
Location: Andaman Limp Dick of Certain Doom
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby swishnicholson » Mon Apr 13, 2015 19:34:27

phatj wrote:Heard this from my daughter...

What do you call a pony that's coming down with a cold?


[Reveal] Spoiler:
A little horse (hoarse)?
"No woman can call herself free who does not control her own body."

swishnicholson
BSG MVP
BSG MVP
 
Posts: 39187
Joined: Fri Dec 29, 2006 22:56:15
Location: First I was like....And then I was like...
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby Soren » Mon Apr 13, 2015 19:47:10

What do you call a gay chickpea?
Olivia Meadows, your "emotional poltergeist"

Soren
Plays the Game the Right Way
Plays the Game the Right Way
 
Posts: 39874
Joined: Thu May 28, 2009 13:44:19
Location: area x
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby phatj » Mon Apr 13, 2015 20:18:13

swishnicholson wrote:
phatj wrote:Heard this from my daughter...

What do you call a pony that's coming down with a cold?


[Reveal] Spoiler:
A little horse (hoarse)?

:)
they were a chick hanging out with her friends at a bar, the Phillies would be the 320 lb chick with a nose wart and a dick - Trent Steele

phatj
Moderator
 
Posts: 20683
Joined: Thu Dec 28, 2006 23:07:06
Location: Andaman Limp Dick of Certain Doom
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby slugsrbad » Mon Apr 13, 2015 20:22:04

Soren wrote:What do you call a gay chickpea?


[Reveal] Spoiler:
gaybonzo bean, hummusexual, benGAY gram, eGAYptian pea
Quick Google shows that GoGo is wrong with regards to the Kiwi and the Banana.

Doll Is Mine wrote:This Ellen DeGeneres look alike on ESPN is annoying. Who the hell is he?

slugsrbad
Plays the Game the Right Way
Plays the Game the Right Way
 
Posts: 27586
Joined: Tue Jul 28, 2009 15:52:49
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby Soren » Mon Apr 13, 2015 20:34:16

slugsrbad wrote:
Soren wrote:What do you call a gay chickpea?


[Reveal] Spoiler:
gaybonzo bean, hummusexual, benGAY gram, eGAYptian pea


What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea?
Olivia Meadows, your "emotional poltergeist"

Soren
Plays the Game the Right Way
Plays the Game the Right Way
 
Posts: 39874
Joined: Thu May 28, 2009 13:44:19
Location: area x
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby slugsrbad » Mon Apr 13, 2015 20:40:27

Soren wrote:
slugsrbad wrote:
Soren wrote:What do you call a gay chickpea?


[Reveal] Spoiler:
gaybonzo bean, hummusexual, benGAY gram, eGAYptian pea


What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea?


What?
Quick Google shows that GoGo is wrong with regards to the Kiwi and the Banana.

Doll Is Mine wrote:This Ellen DeGeneres look alike on ESPN is annoying. Who the hell is he?

slugsrbad
Plays the Game the Right Way
Plays the Game the Right Way
 
Posts: 27586
Joined: Tue Jul 28, 2009 15:52:49
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby Soren » Mon Apr 13, 2015 20:42:28

I've never had a garbanzo bean on my face
Olivia Meadows, your "emotional poltergeist"

Soren
Plays the Game the Right Way
Plays the Game the Right Way
 
Posts: 39874
Joined: Thu May 28, 2009 13:44:19
Location: area x
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby slugsrbad » Mon Apr 13, 2015 20:44:12

that's great
Quick Google shows that GoGo is wrong with regards to the Kiwi and the Banana.

Doll Is Mine wrote:This Ellen DeGeneres look alike on ESPN is annoying. Who the hell is he?

slugsrbad
Plays the Game the Right Way
Plays the Game the Right Way
 
Posts: 27586
Joined: Tue Jul 28, 2009 15:52:49
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby Bucky » Fri May 15, 2015 23:43:47

When our great 2nd baseman finally goes to the big ballyard in the sky, who will be determining Chase's cause of death??

[Reveal] Spoiler:
Utley's Coroner

Bucky
BSG MVP
BSG MVP
 
Posts: 58017
Joined: Fri Dec 29, 2006 19:24:05
Location: You_Still_Have_To_Visit_Us
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby WheelsFellOff » Sun May 17, 2015 17:04:20

Mike Piazza Crematory
So far the Eagles have been unable willing to at least make a good will jester - Garry Cobb, Professional Sportswriter

jerseyhoya wrote:My hatred of quote boxes in signatures has reached a new high

WheelsFellOff
Plays the Game the Right Way
Plays the Game the Right Way
 
Posts: 27290
Joined: Thu Mar 25, 2010 13:43:13
Location: Bologna
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby TomatoPie » Sun May 31, 2015 16:10:37

Statistics released from The United Nations reveal that: Australian, Canadian, UK and US married men between 30 and 55 years of age, will, on average, have sex two to three times per week, whereas Japanese men, in the same age group, will have sex only once or twice per year.

This is very upsetting news to most of my friends, as they had no idea they were Japanese.
Kill the chicken to scare the monkey

TomatoPie
Dropped Anchor
Dropped Anchor
 
Posts: 5184
Joined: Sat Mar 24, 2007 22:18:10
Location: Delaware Valley
Top

Re: Corny Jokes

Postby ashton » Wed Jun 24, 2015 08:44:37

Image

ashton
There's Our Old Friend
There's Our Old Friend
 
Posts: 2147
Joined: Mon Jan 01, 2007 23:14:06
Top
PreviousNext
Post a reply
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group