You can try and rationalize this as much as you want, but you're still a loser

And dude, a $35K wedding ain't much

man, if this book that I'm proofing is a let down, I'm going to be so pissed off. Because right now, it is good stuff. very good stuff.

you all have really rich friends then. mine are like 24-25 and barely in their first jobs when they got married. no way they are paying that much for a wedding.

Woody wrote:The rule of thumb, cheapskate, is to give a gift that AT A MINIMUM covers the cost of your plate at the reception. Unless you're going to some real cheapo fire hall weddings, you're way off base.

Calvin, buck up: Woodrow's given you the perfect loophole, b/c he hasn't specified

a) WHICH plate you're gonna price against (salad, appetizer, entree, side dish, etc), OR

b)whether he's referring to the PRICE of "the plate" or the COST (sure, he's typed "cost", but consider the source)

c) whether may consider just your own plate, or whether you're obliged to adjust for your spouse's/guest's feedbag as well

that's the hangup with these rules of thumb. not enough fingers

It doesn't matter how much it costs or whether you would have had cheetos and diet rite, you're invited to the party and a recipient of that expense. Don't go if you're gonna be cheap. If you don't want to go and still go, well that's on you.

I think if you make less than 30K, a hundred dollar gift is plenty. I'm pretty sure my friends don't think I'm a scumbag for giving a hundo.

I'm confident that none - not one - of our guests' gifts matched in price what we spent for their chow. Everyone dined like royalty & we could not have had a better time.

But if I'd suggested to my wife that we spend anything like the equivalent of $35k on our nuptials the event would not have transpired.

The minx, makes me hot just remembering that

Houshphandzadeh wrote:I think if you make less than 30K, a hundred dollar gift is plenty. I'm pretty sure my friends don't think I'm a scumbag for giving a hundo.

I'll give you that, got too focused on Woody's point. I'm presuming relative income levels.

Woody wrote:The rule of thumb, cheapskate, is to give a gift that AT A MINIMUM covers the cost of your plate at the reception. Unless you're going to some real cheapo fire hall weddings, you're way off base.

The Knot's rule of thumb: "bite hard"

It's a window on a different world.

I can't remember exactly now, but I think our wedding came in around 8 grand, so maybe $14000 dollars?. Smaller group for dinner, larger for party. only so much free booze goin' round. We got some very, very generous presents. But I don't remember much in terms of cash, and we'd specified quite clearly beforehand we didn't want anything. Hell, I paid for one of my friends from london to come up.

Having said that, if I get invited to a wedding by a friend and I can't get them a decent gift of some sort, it's not a good thing.

Houshphandzadeh wrote:I think if you make less than 30K, a hundred dollar gift is plenty. I'm pretty sure my friends don't think I'm a scumbag for giving a hundo.

Of course, but when have we ever passed an opportunity to make calvinballs feel self conscious

I do think it's perfectly fair to cheap out on the gift for a second wedding, if you bought a gift that wasn't returned for the first wedding.

Marriage is the barbiturate of the masses.

WheelsFellOff wrote:Marriage is the barbiturate of the masses.

I think it's more like Ny-Quil

phatj wrote:

WheelsFellOff wrote:Marriage is the barbiturate of the masses.

I think it's more like Ny-Quil

naw, that's the kiddies.

Marriage is the chemical castration of the masses

A friend of mine gave us $150 at our wedding 3 weeks ago. He's getting married tomorrow. I should just give him his check back with VOID written on it.

On second thought, I should deduct like $50 for having his wedding during the Phillies game. But he's a Pirates fan...he doesn't know any better.

Marion wrote:A friend of mine gave us $150 at our wedding 3 weeks ago. He's getting married tomorrow. I should just give him his check back with VOID written on it.

On second thought, I should deduct like $50 for having his wedding during the Phillies game. But he's a Pirates fan...he doesn't know any better.

You should estimate how much your plate cost compared to how much it cost at your wedding and, depending on the result, either give the difference or a bill. (and an itemized receipt)

td11 wrote:i have 21 tabs open. it has to signify a character flaw of some kind.

I'm letting you know next time one of my friends or cousins get married. Not really, but that would be awesome.

I had the wait staff open the cards and gifts as the guests entered the reception. Then they were offered their dinner selection based on the value of the gift. There were three tiers: Hot dogs/hamburgers, Filet/Chicken/Salmon, and the third was meal #2 with the addition of an open bar wristband.

I think people liked that. I haven't really talked to anyone who was there since that night.