When Random Thoughts hits 8, you're gonna see

by **Bakestar** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 13:16:22

Houshphandzadeh wrote:Oh yeah, and know what's awesome? Verifying that your ex's new boyfriend is ugly.

Even better to find out that your ex got ugly/fat herself.

by **CrashburnAlley** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 14:04:32

Didn't I? wrote:
Houshphandzadeh wrote:
TenuredVulture wrote:
CrashburnAlley wrote:
Houshphandzadeh wrote:I guess TV is on to something. Stand-up just isn't that great.

Percentage-wise, it's awful, but there are still a few good ones out there. Louis C.K., Bill Maher, Jim Norton, Doug Stanhope, Louis Katz are some good stand-up comedians. Maher hasn't had an HBO stand-up special in a couple years, though.

That's not what I said. But stand up comedy is most often a reflection of its times.

I think not standing even a small test of time is a sign of suckiness.

And Jesus, Bill Maher and Jim Norton?

I saw Jim Norton live a few months ago. It wasn't his typical crowd, but still, he was pretty awful. And Crashburn, Doug Stanhope? Whenever I've seen him it's been painful.

My favorite standup comics today are Zach Galifianakis, Louis CK, Dave Attell and Eugene Mirman. I like Michael Showalter too, although his standup is probably my least favorite thing he does.

I don't really judge stand-up comedians by their popularity. Stanhope and Norton are hilarious and one of the few comedians who elicit literal LOL's from me. Carlin, obviously, was another.

Maher doesn't elicit literal LOL's but he's funny regardless. His material is a bit more intellectual, with the monotony broken up by the odd handjob joke.

by **Didn't I?** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 14:24:34

^^^^^

Man, Carlin did that Baseball/Football routine for awhile. He did it on the first ever episode of SNL in 1975 too.

Here's my favorite Carlin bit, about the Ten Commandments:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rCz0-HY1TLU[/youtube]

by **TenuredVulture** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 14:31:22

Last night's episode of a very early (pre-1976, probably first season) episode of SNL (George Carlin was host) was pretty solid evidence that the early episodes really are not much better than current ones. I fell asleep with about 20 minutes to go, as usual.

One difference--bits seemed shorter, so if they sucked, you didn't have to sit through it as long.

by **Didn't I?** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 14:36:41

TenuredVulture wrote:Last night's episode of a very early (pre-1976, probably first season) episode of SNL (George Carlin was host) was pretty solid evidence that the early episodes really are not much better than current ones. I fell asleep with about 20 minutes to go, as usual.

One difference--bits seemed shorter, so if they sucked, you didn't have to sit through it as long.

TV, that had to be the first episode ever. Carlin didn't host again until 10 years later. I'm sure that first show still had lots of kinks.

EDIT: Here's the description of that episode from IMDB. Those skits actually sound pretty funny and pretty risky for 1975 Network TV. And check out the mock commercial about a 3-blade razor!

Season 1, Episode 1: George Carlin/Billy Preston, Janis Ian
Original Air Date: 11 October 1975
The host for the episode is George Carlin, and the musical guests are Billy Preston and Janis Ian. The skits for this episode are as follows: an ESL teacher steadily loses his temper when a student repeats his every word. New Dad Insurance offers bereaved families a new father to take the place of their deceased one. A distraught rape victim in a courtroom describes the attacker's words in writing, which then confuses an inattentive jurist. Andy Kaufmann sings along with a Mighty Mouse record. A reporter interviews the victim of a shark bite who, despite his claims to the contrary, obviously still has all his limbs. Two men, claiming to be a married couple, discuss the benefits of a new vitamin product called Jamitol. A mock ad for pain-reliever Triopenin plays up the product's child-proof caps. Albert Brooks presents a documentary titled "The Impossible Truth," in which he presents several shocking news stories. In the maternity ward of a hospital for bees, father bees anxiously wait to find out if their children will be drones or workers. The Academy of Better Careers offers people an exciting new life answering telephones. Valri Bromfield presents a monologue as a volleyball coach giving some very personal advice to her players before a game. In a mock commercial parodying Lark cigarettes, a truck rolls through town asking people to show their guns. A home security system installer breaks into a couple's home and scares them to death to demonstrate how much they need an alarm installed. Finally, another mock commercial presents 3-bladed razors as an absolute household necessity. During the show, George Carlin performs monologues on blue food, religion, baseball vs. football, and other observations. During the Weekend Update, Chevy Chase reports about President's Ford bumping his head and Emperor Hirohito visiting Disneyland. Billy Preston performs "Nothing from Nothing" and "Fancy Lady," while Janis Ian performs "At Seventeen" and "In the Winter".

by **TenuredVulture** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 14:55:34

Didn't I? wrote:
TenuredVulture wrote:Last night's episode of a very early (pre-1976, probably first season) episode of SNL (George Carlin was host) was pretty solid evidence that the early episodes really are not much better than current ones. I fell asleep with about 20 minutes to go, as usual.

One difference--bits seemed shorter, so if they sucked, you didn't have to sit through it as long.

TV, that had to be the first episode ever. Carlin didn't host again until 10 years later. I'm sure that first show still had lots of kinks.

EDIT: Here's the description of that episode from IMDB. Those skits actually sound pretty funny and pretty risky for 1975 Network TV. And check out the mock commercial about a 3-blade razor!

Season 1, Episode 1: George Carlin/Billy Preston, Janis Ian
Original Air Date: 11 October 1975
The host for the episode is George Carlin, and the musical guests are Billy Preston and Janis Ian. The skits for this episode are as follows: an ESL teacher steadily loses his temper when a student repeats his every word. New Dad Insurance offers bereaved families a new father to take the place of their deceased one. A distraught rape victim in a courtroom describes the attacker's words in writing, which then confuses an inattentive jurist. Andy Kaufmann sings along with a Mighty Mouse record. A reporter interviews the victim of a shark bite who, despite his claims to the contrary, obviously still has all his limbs. Two men, claiming to be a married couple, discuss the benefits of a new vitamin product called Jamitol. A mock ad for pain-reliever Triopenin plays up the product's child-proof caps. Albert Brooks presents a documentary titled "The Impossible Truth," in which he presents several shocking news stories. In the maternity ward of a hospital for bees, father bees anxiously wait to find out if their children will be drones or workers. The Academy of Better Careers offers people an exciting new life answering telephones. Valri Bromfield presents a monologue as a volleyball coach giving some very personal advice to her players before a game. In a mock commercial parodying Lark cigarettes, a truck rolls through town asking people to show their guns. A home security system installer breaks into a couple's home and scares them to death to demonstrate how much they need an alarm installed. Finally, another mock commercial presents 3-bladed razors as an absolute household necessity. During the show, George Carlin performs monologues on blue food, religion, baseball vs. football, and other observations. During the Weekend Update, Chevy Chase reports about President's Ford bumping his head and Emperor Hirohito visiting Disneyland. Billy Preston performs "Nothing from Nothing" and "Fancy Lady," while Janis Ian performs "At Seventeen" and "In the Winter".

I tuned in at the Andy Kaufman bit. The shark bite bit, weekend update, Janis Ian, Weekend update, Jamitol, and Triopenin shown. There was also a muppet bit, some very brief carlin monologues. So, I suspect the show I saw was edited.

by **Slowhand** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 15:03:44

I have about a week's worth of free burritos from Chipotle coming my way. WOOHOO!

by **TenuredVulture** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 15:14:52

Slowhand wrote:I have about a week's worth of free burritos from Chipotle coming my way. WOOHOO!

Make sure you keep some matches in the bathroom.

by **jerseyhoya** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 15:15:36

Slowhand wrote:I have about a week's worth of free burritos from Chipotle coming my way. WOOHOO!

I had Chipotle for lunch. It was delicious.

by **Slowhand** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 15:28:29

TenuredVulture wrote:
Slowhand wrote:I have about a week's worth of free burritos from Chipotle coming my way. WOOHOO!

Make sure you keep some matches in the bathroom.

Luckily for anyone around me, I never get gassy from Chipotle. I skip the beans and have them put on grilled onions and peppers instead. Used my first coupon today. Free food tastes especially good.

by **FlightRisk** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 16:21:04

One possible Future

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GFGzGfym-7Y[/youtube]

by **z ipper** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 17:44:27

does this do more harm than good? i say yes

by **CFP** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 18:02:45

I was at a party earlier for my great aunt and this guy who is a relative of sorts (I have no idea who he is) was talking about our old priest like he was Pat Burrell. "Oh man, he was just too intelligent for that church I tells ya. This new guy seems like he's a real character."

New priest=gritty!

by **Woody** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 19:18:44

My wife's aunt and uncle just sent us our wedding present, nearly 17 months after we were married. It was 2 North Face jackets (apparently the aunt works there)--just in time for summer! At least they got here before the baby. I do like the jacket still, even though I asked for grey and got blue

by **Phight On!** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 20:02:11

Woody wrote:My wife's aunt and uncle just sent us our wedding present, nearly 17 months after we were married. It was 2 North Face jackets (apparently the aunt works there)--just in time for summer! At least they got here before the baby. I do like the jacket still, even though I asked for grey and got blue

At least your in-laws finally made good. Did you have any complete "wedbeats" at your wedding? We had two- both on my wife's side. One was some skank in the wedding party and the other was her cousin who flew in from Baton Rouge. One of my good friends flew in from Jacksonville and she still managed a card/gift but this prick couldn't even spring for a hallmark. Both apologized and said they would make it up to us but we're going on 5 years so we're not keeping our fingers crossed.

Plus there were a few people who really went the cheap route and got us stuff like an iced tea maker and a fucking smores maker- I mean what are fucking retarded?

Before the wedding, our parents offered us the wedding or the cost of the wedding in cash. I don't want to get into specifics but let's say it was more than 15K but less than 45 K. I wanted the cash. She wanted the wedding. We went the wedding route. Apparently to a woman, a wedding is like their Super Bowl and World Series x 100.

by **VoxOrion** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 21:00:01

Woody wrote:My wife's aunt and uncle just sent us our wedding present, nearly 17 months after we were married. It was 2 North Face jackets (apparently the aunt works there)--just in time for summer! At least they got here before the baby. I do like the jacket still, even though I asked for grey and got blue

Waaaahhhh

by **Woody** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 21:03:46

That was calculated, not random, sir

by **VoxOrion** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 21:06:39

You're right, I self-censored my initial response.

by **Woody** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 21:44:42

WOODY YOU ELITIST PRICK COMPLAINING ABOUT SOME FREE EXPENSIVE COATS GO PLAY IN TRAFFIC

by **Scarlett** » Sun Jun 29, 2008 21:56:06

Left my house at 7:30 this morning with BF, in his car.
Returned around 7:00 pm to find my car in the driveway, with emergency flashers on. Neighbor says they started flashing around 9 am.
Assumed attempted break in......
Actual cause: the little suction cup EZPass holder popped off the windshield, bounced off the emergency flasher button, and landed in the front seat!
The best news: the car started right up, despite 10 hours of emergency lights flashing!
Also, neighbors were worried I was injured inside the car or house and being all creative about how to let someone know. They teamed up and were peeking into car and house windows, and left messages on my home and office phones. When I got home, one came flying out of his house to make sure all was well. How sweet is that?

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When Random Thoughts hits 8, you're gonna see