Bucky wrote:What comedian was it who said "I was born and raised Catholic, so obviously now, I'm an atheist" ?

I would have to guess George Carlin, although I couldn't find that exact quote. It was worth looking though to come across this Emo Phillips joke:

When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.

Religion has had one purpose from the day it was created to today...keep poor people in line. Sure, you may not have the land, the cows, the fame, the money, the notoriety as the rich, but remember, you'll end up in a better place when all is said and done. People believe it, allow themselves to get abused because they think god is going to give them the golden ticket, but there ain't no umpaloompas to be found.

It's to give you a reason to not "even" things out. And they do one bang up job.

Jesus is just alright with me, Jesus is just alright, oh yeah
Jesus is just alright with me, Jesus is just alright
I don't care what they may say
I don't care what they may do
I don't care what they may say
Jesus is just alright, oh yeah
Jesus is just alright

Jesus is just alright with me, Jesus is just alright, oh yeah
Jesus is just alright with me, Jesus is just alright

I don't care what they may know
I don't care where they may go
I don't care what they may know
Jesus is just alright, oh yeah

Jesus, he's my friend; Jesus, he's my friend
He took me by the hand; Led me far from this land
Jesus, he's my friend

Jesus is just alright with me, Jesus is just alright, oh yeah
Jesus is just alright with me, Jesus is just alright

I don't care what they may say, I don't care what they may do
I don't care what they may say, Jesus is just alright, oh yeah

Rock 8)

you bunch of freaking heathens

there are 5 jews? yuck.

This is a church I could get into

we have a sikh member?? thats cool.

pacino wrote:you bunch of freaking heathens

You expected Phillies fans to be big believers in God?

The Red Tornado wrote:Role of Women in religion quiz

the answers:

Women should never be teachers because they are easily deceived

A woman is never to open her mouth in church. She has nothing valuable to say and should limit her participation to asking her husband to explain things to her

woman must obey her husband in all matters at all times

God expressly says men are worth more, and actually provides dollar amounts proving this

She should be depressed and pray day and night

The woman is unclean for seven days if the child is a boy, but she is unclean for twice as long if the child is a girl

A woman must dress modestly and refrain from wearing expensive jewelry and a woman should wear her hair long

No, because women are deceitful and manipulative and because a woman's promise is null and void if her husband disapproves of it

When the woman is raped in the country as opposed to the city or when the woman is a slave girl)

^that is when you can spare the life of a raped woman

While the men are to be killed, the women are to be taken as slaves. Pretty women are to become the wives of conquering men who find them attractive. Women in places the Lord gives His chosen people as an inheritance are to be killed along with every other living thing

Women played a very important role in the early Christian Church. Mary Magdalene, for example, was possibly the most important person in Jesus' crew.

Jesus treated women as equals to men in many ways. He exalted the woman who washed his feet with her tears and dried them with her hair. Jesus was very much a radical. Treating women with dignity and respect was one way in which he was so. In his time, men didn't talk to women in public. But he did.

That stuff is in the bible too. When folks want to portray Christians as knuckle dragging Neanderthals, they can always find quotes in the bible to do so. But it doesn't come close to telling the whole story. (If the subject was baseball here we'd call it a small sample size problem).

There are many, many examples of strong, independent, intelligent women throughout the bible. The early Christians were probably the most progressive folks in the world at that time.

In my religion, the role of women isn't anything like the one portrayed in the bozo article from the above post. Perhaps the name of the article should read The Role of Women in Bozo Religions or something.

I think you guys were had by some weak parody.

they quote actual scriptures next to those answers though

I'd rather mock literalism than hold Christians to it.

i believe that site is a fake, but it shows how literally reading the bible is fun

1/2 of you are atheists and agnostics... No wonder Philly teams never win any championships.

This joke might have been done already but I'm not reading this whole thread

I believe when God did the valuation of men and women, it was in 1950 US Dollars. Since then, the weakness of the doallr has made them almost the same.

i haven't believed in god since the first and only time i got road head

Woody wrote:i haven't believed in god since the first and only time i gave road head

yea that was a fun time