Barry Jive wrote:@HinkieMarijuana

please DM wwry and joetable the login for this

wwry wrote:Brett Brown: have you ever met that 15 year old basketball reporter? he desperately wanted to smoke with me and whipped out a sack full of cat nip

Sam Hinkie: i traded him that catnip in exchange for his pokemon card collection

Brett Brown: *rolling a tight bone* you can't even find anyone to play that #$!&@ with you.

Sam Hinkie: the cards are fun to look at and read by myself.

*slow clap*

For real. This thread is top notch.

MCW: Coach you're stoned literally every time i see you. why aren't the players allowed to spark up?

Brett Brown: if it were up to me, michael the whole team would smoke an ounce at every practice but the NBA substance abuse policy prevents that. but i can promise you that i'll supply any players that want it with the finest synthetic bud and legal marijuana alternatives available

MCW: fuck your fake bake and fuck you for letting Marcus Hayes smoke with you over me

Brett Brown: i have no respect for the man. we told him swallowing the roach gets you higher and he actually believes it. its very funny.

Sam Hinkie: *walks in to Brown's office with a bong in each hand* i would have preferred to save those roaches to smoke at a later time

I'm going to out myself, but I've never smoked in my life, so a lot of this is going over my head, but just reading anything by coach in his accent makes me giggle every time. Also, I've been reading Hinkie as Milton from Office Space too.

wwry wrote:MCW: Coach you're stoned literally every time i see you. why aren't the players allowed to spark up?

Brett Brown: if it were up to me, michael the whole team would smoke an ounce at every practice but the NBA substance abuse policy prevents that. but i can promise you that i'll supply any players that want it with the finest synthetic bud and legal marijuana alternatives available

MCW: fuck your fake bake and fuck you for letting Marcus Hayes smoke with you over me

Brett Brown: i have no respect for the man. we told him swallowing the roach gets you higher and he actually believes it. its very funny.

Sam Hinkie: *walks in to Brown's office with a bong in each hand* i would have preferred to save those roaches to smoke at a later time

fuck

I laughed so much at the last 2 pages. wwry, you are incredible.

[a couple of player agents are waiting in Hinkie's office patiently]
Agent 1: *checks the time* jesus christ it's been 45 minutes already. where the hell is he?
Agent 2: he makes his own rules man. just sit tight.
[another 15 minutes pass. distinct noises can be heard coming from small closet in the corner of office]
Agent 2: you hear that?
[hinkie stumbles out of closet]
Hinkie: good evening gentlemen
a1: sam it's 930AM
Hinkie: good evening
a2: sam, this is ridiculous. you can't just make us wait for 45 minutes to discuss urgent matters
[hinkie produces 3 blunts from his inside jacket pocket, lights 2 of them and takes a huge drag from each]
hinkie: go on

I'm planning my weekend around these

I mean he said good evening a second time. I dont even

anyone going to sixers beach bash

Someone should actually point Michael levin from libertyballers in the direction of this thread as a clear demonstration as to what is actually funny.

On second thought, that simply would be a very bad idea.

Houshphandzadeh wrote:anyone going to sixers beach bash

td11 wrote:[a couple of player agents are waiting in Hinkie's office patiently]
Agent 1: *checks the time* jesus christ it's been 45 minutes already. where the hell is he?
Agent 2: he makes his own rules man. just sit tight.
[another 15 minutes pass. distinct noises can be heard coming from small closet in the corner of office]
Agent 2: you hear that?
[hinkie stumbles out of closet]
Hinkie: good evening gentlemen
a1: sam it's 930AM
Hinkie: good evening
a2: sam, this is ridiculous. you can't just make us wait for 45 minutes to discuss urgent matters
[hinkie produces 3 blunts from his inside jacket pocket, lights 2 of them and takes a huge drag from each]
hinkie: go on

yes!

Grotewold wrote:

Houshphandzadeh wrote:anyone going to sixers beach bash

for some dumb reason there's no website for it yet but it's 8/4 in Avalon, food, Dream Team, raffles etc

Nerlens Noel (rest) and KJ McDaniels (ankle sprain) are not playing today in OPSL title game.


cant even man up for the title game

Bader's got this

Houshphandzadeh wrote:

Grotewold wrote:

Houshphandzadeh wrote:anyone going to sixers beach bash

for some dumb reason there's no website for it yet but it's 8/4 in Avalon, food, Dream Team, raffles etc

Awesome, thanks

Enjoyed a brief Dream Team interaction (ie, super awkward photo) on draft night

[Hinkie's secretary dials his office]

Secretary: Mr Hinkie, the commissioner is on line 1 for you
Hinkie: yes thank you, put him through please
Silver: Hey Sam, how's it going?
Hinkie: What's up Stern? I was just thinking about you, you know. Yesterday Jarell Embiid came into my office and said he could straight up do the best greg oden impression i've ever seen. and then he did it. it was uncanny. later he said he saw a blog where it said that you look like a frog, and i told him i had to agree.
Silver: this is adam silver
Hinkie: it's mating season for frogs in the Delaware valley right now
Silver: that's very interesting, sam. listen the real reason i called you is that this trade proposal you sent yesterday is completely illegal. who even is "Magic 'the Puffman' Johnson, SG/C" on the Pittsburgh Condors?
Hinkie: that wasn't meant for your toad eyes. fax it back and i'll have the interns fix it
Silver: i can't fax it back. you sent us a wooden tablet with the proposal engraved
Hinkie: consider it a housewarming gift

td11 wrote:fax it back and i'll have the interns fix it